Why You Feel Stuck and How to Get Unstuck
It can seem like so many things are causing you to feel stuck in life at times. You may be thinking to yourself things like:
“I don’t have enough money to do what I really wanna do.”
“I’m not healed enough to be in a serious relationship yet.”
“I don’t have enough time or energy to invest into my passions.”
Or, “I feel so lost that I have no idea what I really want to do with my life.”
And, the list goes on and on. At the end of the day, these are merely excuses you give yourself to let you off the hook from actually trying to go after what you want. And, these excuses begin to be the exact thing holding you back - taking form as self sabotage.
Feeling stuck sucks. Trust me, I know. I’ve honestly been feeling a bit stuck myself over the past few months, mostly because many things are uncertain in my life right now. But the fact of the matter is you are never truly stuck. You just think you are, and so you act accordingly.
But what would happen if you think and act as if you weren’t stuck? What would happen if you were resourceful and found ways to do what you want to do, despite the excuses you give? There is always a way. ALWAYS.
You might not like to hear it, but I need to be honest with you. You don’t actually want the things you think you want. You don’t actually want the vacation, the car, the relationship, the money, etc. You might be thinking to yourself, “ummm hell yeah I do, you’re crazy if you think I don’t.” But, really think about it for a moment. When you truly ask yourself what it is that you want it is not about the thing itself as much as the feeling that the thing brings.
For example, a vacation may bring you a greater sense of peace and relaxation. Traveling may allow you to see new things and meet new people who inspire you. More money may offer you more time, freedom, or opportunities. A committed relationship may bring you a greater sense of love and security. Dedicating more time to your passions may bring you more joy and fulfillment.
So, when you actually think about it, you don’t want the thing itself. You want the feeling that it brings. And, the best way to get unstuck is to stop fixating on the thing itself and focus on cultivating the feeling you want to experience. Because the truth is you can experience those feelings without the things you think you need to experience them.
Maybe you can’t have the exact thing you want right now, but you always have the power to access the feeling associated with it. If you want to feel more peaceful, curate a time and space to feel that. If you want to have more freedom in your day, make time and space (even for 15 minutes) to feel a sense of freedom or having no responsibilities. If you want to experience more love in your life, open yourself up to the possibility of feeling this in many different forms - such as self-love, platonic love, and romantic love.
Along with learning to cultivate the feelings you so deeply desire to experience, here are some activities to try if you're still feeling stuck or are in a space of uncertainty and want to gain more clarity.
Meditate - Prioritize making time to quiet your mind however this looks for you. Actually sitting still and listening to a guided meditation with a script designed to help you slow down your breathing and quiet the mind is the best way to help you to connect with the present moment and what it is you truly want. So much clarity can come from a few moments of quiet and stillness. Some people even find themselves in a meditative state while running or writing. It doesn’t always have to be meditation in a traditional sense.
Yoga - Yoga is a form of meditation for many, but it’s also much more than that. Yoga, as most of us know it today, allows you to combine intentional movement with breath. In essence, it requires you to be hyper aware of the present moment. This allows you to separate yourself from the thoughts you’ve been ruminating on and simultaneously calms your nervous system with breathwork.
Journal - The best way to journal when you are feeling stuck is to either seek out helpful prompts or to free write whatever is on your mind. Sometimes we feel stuck when we have no outlet for our thoughts. Having a safe and private space to release the negative thoughts especially can be helpful. I also recommend reading back what you’ve written as if you were someone else. That way you can see it from a different perspective.
Talk to a Professional - Having someone to talk to whose job it is to be there for you, hold you to the highest version of yourself, and ask you the tough questions is a game changer. Experiencing this level of support and accountability truly allows you to see what you are experiencing in a new light, as well as learn healthier coping strategies and how to take aligned action towards what you want.
The reason a lot of us feel stuck is because we are chasing after things to feel a certain way when in actuality if we can learn to access the feelings first, we start to become stronger magnets for the things themselves or even realize we don’t want the things we thought we wanted before.
If we are always chasing after physical things, how will we ever learn to enjoy where we are at?
I encourage you to take the time today to ask yourself, what is actually making you feel so stuck right now? And, if it has to do with a thing you currently do not have, how can you allow yourself to feel what that thing would bring you now? What small changes can you make in your life, to feel peace, freedom, love, and abundance now?
If this article resonates with you, share it with someone who you think could benefit from reading it! If you feel called to work together one-on-one, I host free 45-minute discovery sessions which you can book here. And, if you’re looking to get into yoga and meditation, I’m hosting 3 free virtual yoga and meditation group sessions in the month of April. If you’re interested in signing up, send me an email or DM on Instagram.